Timing is everything.

Have you ever wanted something so bad that even forces of nature know about it so well that they will try to play around your sensitive feelings and wouldn't give it to you even if you go down on your knees, break down and cry? (yes, like the song.) Ha. I've learned a thing or two from my crappy choices in life and one thing that stands out sitting pretty on top of the list is the fact that I make impulsive decisions and that I tend to forget all about its possible long term effects in my life. Whether it be a positive one or the other way around. 

For example, if I decide on pushing through something for my career growth abroad then it means I'd have to risk the possibility of losing someone I care for cos I'm gunna have to leave them behind. Not because I could care less, but because as an adult with obligations and still building up a career --I have to set my priorities straight. First things first. Eye on the goal. Reasonable? Yea? Nah? Either way, it sucks. That mere fact of being caught up in choosing between career or love, your long term priorities or current happiness is a total pain in the butt. Arghhhh. Worse.. feeling.. ever!! 

Do I make sense? I honestly don't care if I don't. I'm really just trying to clear my head right now through typing whatever. In a nutshell, I guess what I'm trynna say here is that we can't have everything all wrap in one package for our own convenience. ANO TAYO, SINUSUWERTE? Lol. I envy those who are already settled and have made their right choices along the way because they've gotten pass through the hard part of choosing which is which. Yes or no. This or that. Yes I know, shortcuts are unacceptable. More so, unfair. I'm still on that early stage of making hard choices and it aint an easy task. Real talk. I feel like whatever the future holds will depend on whatever I decide to pursue today. But still as a human, you hope for, if not the best at least the smoothest ride. So yes, I'm just really hoping that I'm making the right decision. Probably not as favorable as to what my heart truly desires. But, hopefully the smartest decision I'd ever have to make in my entire life. -A

Right Now.

I honestly have no idea as to how I'm going to start typing here after more than a year of not blogging, so whatever you're currently reading right now is just a warm-up before I start putting my real sh*t together and blog decently on my page. Yupp.

Give me 3 more seconds...*Breathes in and out* Alright, let's do this.

I have been MIA on my blog because of many reasons. First, I got employed again after almost a year of being idle and doing nothing (uhm well, not really "nothing" but yea whatever.). Then my boyfriend of two years and I just recently broke up. So... again, whatever. Enough with all the "What happened??" and whatnot. Puhlease. Afterwards, I returned home to mom and dad and decided to stay a bit longer than usual --for now. Last but not the least, my laptop unfortunately got broken prior to all those instances I mentioned above, so I guess it was really the lappy's fault after all. Not because of the new job nor the break up. Pure justification at its finest. Huzzah.

So yeah, my last blog post was back in July 2014. I was no longer able to post the Singapore and Palawan trip we had on September and October so I will try to blog about it after this comeback post. (Taray with the comeback?! Lol) I must say that I'm still at awe at that particular travel chapter of my life because I never really thought that I'd be brave enough to face my fear of heights (airplanes) and conquer it in this lifetime so it's definitely one for the books, yuh-uh.

As for the break up, well... I've had too much beer and coffee for all the obligated-meetup-with-friends-cos-you-ought-to-tell-them-every-single-damn-detail-that-happened, so I guess I'm sortta entitled to spare my blog from all of that drama and shizz. Yea? Maybe some other time. Thanks. Cos you see, breakups do happen. Right? That's already a sad f*ck --fact I mean. And people just have to live with it and move on. Basic human instinct. Yea? OK. Good.

So then I moved back to my folk's place in Laguna and it was an easy peasy transition tbh. Besides, I've lived with them my whole life and it has only been just the three of us ever since. So when I got back, no words had to be spoken, no questions asked, basically nothing. Well aside from the fact that they've wanted me to gain weight eversince like forever?! But aside from that, I need not to explain them anything anymore. Not a single question. Srsly. My parents are really the coolest. Yass. I love them so much.

Right now, I have a lot of things going on my mind. Good thing I get to blog again and keep my sanity in tact. Ha! Yes. I feel like blogging has always been my way of escaping reality even for just a while and just blah about whatever that comes into my mind, more like a mental exercise I guess. Uhm... I'm starting to feel a bit groggy now because I'm on medication (antibiotics) for flu. Yea, I've been feeling a bit under the weather lately. So before I'd even say anything stupid here lemme cut this sht straight up. I better lie down and get some rest now. Imma take advantage of my 1 week LOA from work and start putting my sht altogether --health issues, overflowing emotions, drastic decisions, life, love and whatever. But yea, I'm happy I get to do this again. Cheers to more blog posts from my not-so-beautiful-mind. Yay, or Nay. -A